I was invited to a Chinese wedding. I put ¥500 in a red envelope and was told that's 'just okay'.

ChinaTravelMemo

My friend from Australia was invited to his Chinese colleague's wedding in Hangzhou. He had never been to a Chinese wedding. He had no idea what to give.

The research:

He asked around.

"How much should I give?"

His other Chinese colleague said: "Depends on your relationship. Colleague? ¥500-1,000. Close friend? ¥1,000-2,000. Family? ¥2,000+."

He decided on ¥500. It felt generous.

The wedding:

The ceremony was at a hotel ballroom. 30 tables. 300 guests.

At the entrance, there was a table with two people and a notebook.

"Please sign the guest book and leave your gift here."

He handed over his red envelope with ¥500.

They wrote his name and the amount in the notebook.

He saw the person before him had given ¥1,000.

The reality:

At the reception, he sat at a table with other colleagues.

Someone asked: "How much did you give?"

He said ¥500.

They nodded politely. "That's... okay."

He later learned: the average for colleagues at this particular wedding was ¥800-1,000. His ¥500 was the minimum.

Chinese wedding gift etiquette:

The amount depends on:
• Your relationship to the couple
• The city (Shanghai/Beijing = higher, smaller cities = lower)
• The venue (luxury hotel = higher expectations)

General guidelines (2026):
• Colleague/acquaintance: ¥500-800
• Friend: ¥1,000-2,000
• Close friend/family: ¥2,000-5,000
• Best friend/sibling: ¥5,000-10,000+

Lucky numbers:
• ¥600 (六六大顺)
• ¥800 (八 = prosperity)
• ¥1,000 (round number, acceptable)
• ¥1,688 (一路发发)
• ¥2,000 (even number, generous)

Avoid:
• ¥400 (四 = death)
• ¥250 (means stupid)
• Odd numbers (except for specific lucky ones)

The red envelope:

• Buy a red envelope (红包) from any convenience store or supermarket
• Write your name on it
• Put cash inside
• Hand it to the reception desk at the entrance
• They record your name and amount

What you get back:

• A wedding favor (candy, small gift)
• Sometimes a "return gift" (回礼) of ¥20-50 from the couple
• The memory of a 3-hour banquet with 12 courses

My Australian friend:

"I thought ¥500 was generous. It was the minimum. At least I learned: when in doubt, ask a local friend what's normal. Not what's polite. What's normal."

Anyone else been to a Chinese wedding? How much did you give?